Yesterday I somehow managed to get a temporary job. It's only officially for two weeks but there's the possibility that more work will come up from it and the money's pretty good so I can't complain. I start tomorrow and suddenly realised that none of the clothes I wear are actually suitable for work. I actually had no smart trousers. I'm not sure how, I used to think I had clothes for every occasion but apparently not. I also decided I had no suitable shoes. So I had to buy some more. Two pairs actually. Just incase.
I met up with the ex twice over the past few days. Without saying anything out of order I'd sent him quite a blunt message telling him how it was and just being honest about things. I'm not sure that he quite liked it but he told me he wanted things to work and we agreed to talk things over. We didn't exactly talk too much about our relationship and what had gone so wrong but we got on really well and had a really good time together. The next day he just didn't seem as interested when he came to see me. But I suppose the point is he did come to see me. He did tell me he was tired before hand so maybe that was just the case. I told him I didn't want to be used for sex and he asked me what I wanted. I told him I wanted things to be like they had after christmas and then see where things go. He replied "what, you want me to move in with you?". I don't know if I was too quick to say no or maybe I could have said it with a bit less force but nevermind. I told him I wanted to be seeing each other but keeping it low key for the time being. That I wanted to feel secure that I wasn't just being used for the time being. He seemed fine with that at the time but now I'm not so sure if he just said so to keep me happy and maybe he thinks I was too forward. I only want him to be completely straight with me and have asked him to be. I guess I just need to trust that he is and that he is just overtired. I know that I'm a bit wary of him hurting me again but I've already distanced myself from him once by being overcautious.
I think it's time I got myself ready for tomorrow. Am actually quite glad to be getting out of the house and meeting new people! Not so excited about the thought of the alarm going off tomorrow morning though - don't suppose anyone really is though, lol.